"Capturing Kids' Hearts"

"Capturing Kids' Hearts" is a Flip Flippen trademark to teach behavior management for use with children and teens. The methods have been proven effective in classrooms as well as child rearing in the home. Last weekend I attended a retreat with 7 of my co workers to learn about ways to implement the program in my classroom where I teach. Here are my thoughts about our awesome 3 days in Round Top, TX.
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“My Thoughts about Capturing Kids Hearts’
By Mary Lou Martin

First of all it was a much needed retreat for the eight of us that attended. From the moment we entered the 3 story, antique-filled house the stress of our everyday lives seemed to melt away. Upon our arrival we were welcomed by friendly handshakes and greetings from the two trainers we were soon to know well.

Our trainer was Brian, an all American athlete from Mississippi. Having taught history and coached track for 14 years, he had learned much about relating to his students. His relational teaching style made him a perfect candidate for the job of teen leadership. Teen leadership is a program for middle to high school teens. It molds the child into a person of integrity that will go out better prepared to meet challenges in the college and job world of their futures. However perfect Brian seemed, like all of us, he was not without his personal struggles which he openly shared with us.

We also learned that Brian is married, with 2 young daughters, Mary Margaret and Natalie. Mary Margaret is well on her way to becoming an accomplished gymnastics champion and her sister, Natalie born with a condition that required a stint to be implanted in her head, is an outgoing 5 year old and according to her daddy a real charmer.

What, you may ask, does this have to do with our experience at the Capturing Kids’ Hearts retreat? I would have to answer, “Everything.” The relationships we were all able to form with each other are at the core of what CKH is all about. Brian was open with his personal stories and made us feel the comfortable, safe environment we should all strive to establish in our own classrooms.

In order to do that, we make ourselves approachable from the moment we shake their hands or give them a hug. As much as first impressions impact the way we think of any person, the same holds true for our students toward us. I was impressed to learn that it takes only 30 seconds to make a first impression and 21 additional encounters to undo or change a bad first impression. That’s something to consider if we want these kids on our side.

A five step teaching model was presented and built around the word EXCEL. Engage, X-plore, Communicate, Empower and Launch. Those 5 steps are said to be used by master teachers. This is from our workbook. We are the master teachers when we are willing to set aside our personal agenda for a greater cause. We are master teachers when we serve and empower others. As master teachers our goal is to empower our students to succeed.

Implementing Capturing Kids’ Hearts in our classrooms and on our campus will take time because of the process and labor it will take to build relationships. For just as Brian warned us, if we drop it all on our students at once, they will not know what to do with it. When we returned we explained to our 3rd graders where we had been and why. Something that was easy to try the first day was to greet and do some handshaking at my door. Many of our students are huggers so we got a little of both with not much resistance.
The next tool I was able to practice this week were the 4 questions designed for dealing with misbehavior.
1. Excuse me? What are you doing?
2. What are you supposed to be doing?
3. Are you doing it?
4. What are you going to do about it?
Those are magic questions because almost each time I got the right answers and it redirected their behavior. The next thing I’ll try is writing a Social Contract. That should be interesting with our 3rd graders. But I am feeling confident it’ll have positive effects on our classes.

Capturing Kids’ Hearts can change a lot of negativism that may be present in our school. Not only will we see significant changes in our students, I believe the real changes will be seen in the way we the teachers relate not only to the students, but to each other.

What a wonderful conference and learning experience this was! It revived and reframed my attitude about teaching. It drew my colleagues and I closer together. I’ll never hear the word Honky-Tonk again without thinking about Robyn’s favorite song…at 6:00 a.m. in the morning. Or Suzy’s card game of Phase 10, which was a new one for me and I won! And how could I ever forget Sheryl’s wake-up call with a cowbell? As I said earlier, relationships are at the core of Capturing Kids’ Hearts. What better way to learn about growing relationships with our students than to first grow them in each other?

New Stuff

I have a new computer and I'm so excited about using this laptop. My very generous brother in law was very responsible for me getting this upgrade of technology. I hope that I can learn some new tricks and make my blogs look better. I'm just looking forward to moving through cyberspace with a bit more speed.

Anyway, so far I'm managing to update my information without a lot of trouble. Now to move all of those files from the old computer that did not burn CD's to this new computer. Yikes! I hope I can do that.

I know to some of you computer gurus it would be easy, but I have to read every tutorial and guide to help me. Then if all else fails, I ask my computer savvy husband.

Hey, I got to do a spell check for the first time. A function that my old computer could not perform on this blogsite.

Fair Warning May Not Be Fair

When I've seen a good movie that has a surprise ending or something bizarre happening that no one would ever figure out from the title, I try hard not to spoil that for anyone else that might consider watching it. I want them to experience the same surprise and emotion that I felt. The feeling of being caught up in the moment and transported to that place in time, is fiction at its best.

However, for someone like me, fair warning that a movie will make me cry, does in effect give me pause when deciding if I want to view it or not. When someone tells me to watch the movie with a lot of Kleenex, I know that something bad is going to happen. I'm not always a very positive person. Yes, the glass IS half-empty. Can't you see that?!

I truly believe that I have probably missed some very good movies just because I was not willing to take the risk. I'm afraid of what it is that is going to make me cry or be sad, I begin wondering. Will it be like "City of Angels" where all of a sudden Meg Ryan is hit by a speeding 18-wheeler while bicycling down a country road, smiling with all the love in her heart for Nicholas Cage? Oh, sorry if that just ruined it for someone. I almost couldn't make it through the rest of the movie. Or will it be horrible still like in "The Green Mile" where the poor weasel-bodied prisoner of a man, who really never hurt anyone, is executed in the cruelest manner so as to make every person in the theater wince in disgust at the sight? Which by the way, sent me out of the theater to wait for an hour on my husband and son to finish the movie without me. Even harder to take are the films that are more like truth than fiction as in "Saving Private Ryan". That was a film I had to watch like taking off a Band-aide. Quickly and without thinking too much about whether to see it or not. From the time the old man went to the cemetery until we figured out the true identity of Private Ryan, I sobbed. That was emotionally draining!

When I know how a movie ends, I seem to worry about just when "the thing" will happen. It makes watching the movie so tedious I have been known to say a pray for God to just let it happen and be over. Such was the case in "The Passion of the Christ". What an emotional roller coaster! We all knew the ending, but I don't think we were prepared for what we'd see in the scenes leading up to the actual crucifixion. It was a mix of horror and disbelief! However, I knew going in that it would be hard to watch. As my husband put it, "it was relentless". I was so relieved when that ride finally came to a halt and I was released back out into my world.

Therefore, when I placed a DVD into the player this afternoon, I did it with a bit of apprehension. It was a flick I've had for a month, but because I was told (by well meaning people) that it would make me cry, I wasn't sure if I wanted to see it or not. My attempts to hide emotion sometimes fail, so I wanted to view the movie in privacy. It was what a lot of men refer to as a "chick-flick". It was a teen chick-flick at that too, so how sad could it be? Right? "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" was a wonderful movie. It did all the things that a good moving story should for me, but most of all it transported me back to being a teenage girl. Different from some teen movies, it did not show the young girls as flippant airheads that only fret over what outfit to wear to the prom. There is a definite message behind the story. The four girls were all a little part of who I think I was and probably still am. So, at the risk of ruining the story for you "chicks", watch it with a box of Kleenex close at hand.

The point behind this entire movie ramble is that once again I am faced with my fear of emotion. One of the characters in the "Traveling Pants" story put it something like this, "...isn't trying not to be sad (about your mother’s death) harder than just letting yourself be sad?" I would have to agree.